Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Marriage good, dating...bad?

So the bowl game that's on tonight is turning into a rather unbearable blow out. Because of this, I've been channel surfing. I stopped on the Mountain West Conf. TV Network and saw that they were doing a Cougar Diary recap the year show, so I watched for a bit. The story was about the cross country team and the NCAA championships, etc. etc. They were interviewing a couple team members and coaches discussing the runners and the season.
The head coach said that "one of the unique things about BYU and not at other schools is the number of married athletes." Not a shocker. He continued by explaining why this was so handy: "Married players tend to be more focused. They've settled down, they're not out..." --Now here I'm thinking he's gonna say something like partying, drinking, you know, the type of stuff that goes on at other schools that can cause problems, be detrimental to ones health. Nope. What does he say? "They've settled down, they're not out dating." DATING! DATING??!!!!
Woooooh!! Woooooooooooh!!! Beware the evils of dating! Hang out, wherever possible. But if hanging out doesn't work for you, just get married.

Monday, December 24, 2007

¡Feliz Navidad a todos!

Here's my Christmas present to all you Spanish speakers out there. Those you don't speak Spanish will be able to appreciate this as well.
Merry Christmas!!!

Happy Handbell Christmas!

I hit the jackpot while I was bumming around some Chilean blogs!
Hand Bell Hero!


This thing is way too much fun.

Sunday, December 23, 2007

A coronary

A painful, sorrowful, Christmas-break-joy-destroying coronary!!
That's what BYU's trying to give us! Man alive, couldn't they have at least scored in the second half???!!! Anyway, I'm glad they won, albeit in the most heart-wrenching fashion they could possibly contrive: a blocked field goal with no time left on the clock. This kicker had nailed 2 field goals from beyond 50 yards and had a short chip in to win the game 19-17, but BYU got the blocked field goal: final score BYU 17 UCLA 16.
My heart rate is still high because of the game, like 15 bpm above normal, which is nothing compared to the 100 bpm at the end of that game.

So I've decided something: I should do push-ups and sit-ups during the game, might as well make good use of that elevated heart rate.

Oh, yeah, and to complicate manners, with 30-some-odd seconds left, UCLA got a huge gain on 3rd down which made the field goal a chip shot. This is when I almost started crying. It got worse though, because the ESPN channels WENT BLACK!!!!! Like the power cut out or something and I almost missed the end of the game. It was like the football gods were playing a mean, terrible, nasty trick on me, took me to the brink of death and then brought me back with a near myorcardial infarction, or perhaps spontaneous combustion.

When Cectpa Neeley left on her mission, she said that one of the blessings she hoped for was that the Indians would win the World Series. That didn't happen. Maybe an Ohio State NCAA championship, but that's not gonna happen against LSU. I think the sports gods have been saving up all of these good-deed blessings for BYU's bowl game.


Okay, that's a whole lot more than most of you care about.

Except for another video of the Sin City Miracle:

Saturday, December 22, 2007

My sesquicentennialith entry is a sad one

Today is the saddest day of the year: the Winter Solstice: Dark and cold.
But on a happier note, tomorrow puts us firmly on the path to the happiest day of the year: the Summer Solstice: light and warm. Neither of these days, however is the perfect date.

So there's my 150th entry (a number which includes some test entries not shown).

Hope you enjoy your short December days, and Christmas too.

Thursday, December 20, 2007

Blue man, no seriously

I don't mean these people. But there have been some weird people on CNN lately.




Glow-in-the-dark cats? Blue men? Honestly.

Sunday, December 16, 2007

Creepy

Saturday, December 15, 2007

The horrific analogies that could be made from this 100 Hour Board ?

I dedicate this entry to Bishop Taggart.


When I read this question/answer on the 100 Hour Board, my mind went flying thru all of the possible jokes that would be made in D4, C8, P4, P6, Sherwood, Moon House, B4,the Dawg Pound, and a whole slew of other fellow ward mates who enjoyed that "wild" talk from Bishop.

It seems as though board writer Claudio prefers his crock pots pleasantly plump, and is planning on having his for eternity.

Also, I'd like to make an exciting announcement:
I've found my microwave!! Nice bit of technology and some fun pizza perks, if you catch my drift.

And, at the risk of taking this too far, I strongly considered a Speed Cooking Grill Microhood Combo.

I'm obviously registered at Sears for all of the crock pot and microwave accessories that you think would help me while I prepare for this next step in my life.

Monday, December 10, 2007

Smaller-town Utah

Today I had to go to Payson to take in a voided check for my car insurance. Oh, yeah, Libby is resurrected!! Who knew I'd get her back?
Back to Payson, so I drove to the car insurance people. At the office the had some rather disturbing decorations. They had these large posters with roses in varying stages of life and beauty on them. Three of them all told, probably 3' by 4'. The first one said, 691 All State holders die every day. (2nd) Could today be (3rd) the day you die?
Someone fails Advertising 101!!!! It was so creepy and depressing.
But after that initial shock, my time at the insurance office was rather pleasant. A woman walked by and asked me if I wanted a Coke b/c she was going next store to get some. I had a drink in the car, so I was fine. "You sure?" "Yeah, thanks."
Then the woman helping me sent a fax to Utah's gov't car something or other so that I wouldn't get a $50 fine for not having had insurance on a car I wasn't driving. She typed out this whole memo thingie and helped me know exactly what I could do to get things right. Then we chatted about back in the day when gas was under a dollar, blah blah. It was just relaxed comfortable chatting, with nothing really pressing on us to stop. How is it that 25 minutes to the north in Provo this never happens?
Then I went to The Fork to run a couple more errands. The Fork's a funny place. The high school mascot is the Dons. That's fine, but it becomes especially problematic when it came to the feminine denomination, the Lady Dons, which in my mind is some twisted Spanish hermaphroditic nomenclature, but very funny. Some guy even ranted about this to the Daily Herald. But he suggested the Senoritas or the Donettes. Donettes!!!! What was he thinking? And I'd only go by the Senoritas if there's an ñ involved. I'm not gonna be a Sehn-or-ittuh. Oh, and why not the ¿Doñas? Of course then we'd be the Donnas.
Speaking of gender-bending, I went to The Fork's Macey's and saw some very funny greeting cards. You know the cheesy ones that are around here? Missionary work is a four-letter word: Love. Then there's a darling (wink wink) picture of a little kid with a name tag on with too-big clothes. The name tag of choice for these photos was äldste (Swedish for Elder). Well for the little fake sister missionary with too-large pearls, they also used the äldste name tag. Hmmmm. Oops.
And speaking of local newspapers, The Spanish Fork Press is also funny, funny, funny. My favorite part is the way they spell faux pas: fax pas, fau pax, fau pas, faux pa, fox pas. I think over the years I've seen all of those and probably more variations. The least common variation? faux pas
Who uses faux pas 4 times in one article anyway?


Oh, today Brock and I went to eat and he tried Suco de Caju for the first time and liked it! What American likes cashew juice on the first try?

my mom is the bomb and i'm unhinged

I got my mom addicted to the west wing. She might be more addicted to it than I am. I would like to post the following in honor of my mom--and my recent postings:


So I called my mom today and tried to blackmail her out of her old DVD player b/c Emily's dad's old one gave up the ghost. So she appeared at my apartment with a new DVD/VHS for me. "Merry Christmas," she said. My mom is so nice! Seriously!

So this morning I woke up at 10 and then fell back asleep and bolted awake at 10:57 after having a TERRIBLE nightmare. I have weird dreams, yes, very weird dreams. This one took place at Novell, even though it wasn't totally Novell. Anyway, I was there with Sarah Haynie and we needed to get to a different place at Novell (which was for some reason a huge campus type thingie), so we decided to take the shuttle van thing. We were in there with a man, his wife and their 17 or 18-year-old son. The driver was separate by a wall, well some sort of separating mechanism. He was driving fast and didn't slow down for the turn and we didn't make it and we caught air off of the curb. We slammed into the ground right before a ranch style home and none of the passengers were hurt, but the driver was seriously injured and was killed in the crash. Why none of us were injured is beyond me. But it was trippy.
Dreams are weird.
Anyway, I bolted awake from this dream and apologized to Emily because I was going to make us late. I was totally unhinged because of the nightmare and seriously was not totally mentally capable until sometime after church. Ask Em, I was wack for a long time.

I think I'm mainly back to normal. But I have weird dreams, always have.
I have this recurring nightmare about the planets. For some reason they are coming closer and closer to Earth. Jupiter is by far the most scary as it draws nearer, nearer and nearer. And even nearer. Saturn. Uranus. Neptune. Even Pluto and Charon. While this is happening I'm trying to ignore the fact, but on the inside I'm so terrified that it's all I can do to not fall into the fetal position.
I hate this dream.

I have weird fears: Jupiter approaching, fish, escalators (overcome), ice skating.


What goofy fears to you have?

Friday, December 7, 2007

If you think I'm a nerd, you won't believe this

As per my previous posting, I'd like to point out that I'm very mild about my love for Star Trek compared to some people. I'd just like to point this out by using a couple of video clips:



I've only ever dressed up once as a Star Trek character, and that was for Halloween.
Qapla'!

Thursday, December 6, 2007

Tagged (by Myra)

Myra tagged me a bit ago, so I figured I would finally do what she suggested.

#1--I have nightmares about fish, specifically flying fish. Not this type of flying fish, but normal fish that for some reason fly around in the air and attack me. Or at least they fly near me. But whatever is going on in the dream, it is terrifying and I hate those dreams.

#2--Speaking of weird dreams, last night I dreamt that I was hanging out with Madonna, who I often accidentally called Margaret, or I really believed that her name could be Margaret. Anyway we were reading something.

#3--I like listening in to conversations on the bus. But really I only like listening in on the conversations that are in different languages. I really don't understand a lot of what's going on. Today on the bus for some reason I was surrounded by French. In front of me was African French--which is crazy. I know that it was mostly French with some crazy accent, but a little bit of Spanish: c'était loco. The girls behind me were definitely not French, either. Talk about a weird bus ride. Lots of Spanish surrounding me is to be expected, but French?

#4--I really like to mix root beer with a little bit of Dr. Pepper. Yum. I do this often. So much so that when I'm eating out with my brother, he automatically gets me 2 parts root beer and 1 part Dr. Pepper.

#5--Back in '97 I rewrote the Romeo and Juliet balcony scene with a Klingon flare. My Humanities 101 teacher wanted us to rewrite this scene and do it creatively. I was able to do a lot of the scenes with words that I knew. There's also a mention of an opera in the scene and I just happened to know the name of a Klingon opera. Me=Nerd.

#6--I buy lots of drinks when I go to the store. It's sort of an addiction, I imagine. Heather once said that stores put things in the check-out aisles for people like me, a serial impulse buyer.

There you go, Myra. Hope you enjoyed my hodge-podge of stories